Cooter Scooter: Weekend Edition

You didn't do all that work this week for nothing. That's unless you have no job and you did nothing but smoke weed and drink. If that's the case, you didn't outsmoke your friends and stand on that keg all week for nothing...

Weirdly enough, I've been spooned in this same exact manner this week. St. Patrick's Day was a mutha'.

I Love You, Man - Judd Apatow knows what he's doing. I repeat. Judd Apatow knows what he's doing. With I Love You, we get the same over the top, bathroom humor that we are accustomed to with the Apatow universe of movies. Of course, you can put dialog like that on any premise of a movie like a man having cancer and it will work.

The sticking force to this picture are the two leading men who apparently "love" each other in this movie, no insertion needed. I don't have to gush to you how good Jason Segal is as a comedic actor. He is on one of my favorite shows after all. Oh, yeah Paul Rudd's there too.

Just prepare to have your sense of comedy insulted and your vocabulary exponentially expanded. Holy catchphrases, nobody!

Battlestar Galactica: The Finale - Everytime I read Entertainment Weekly or EW.com, I read up on some sh*t that the writers feel like we should have knowledge in. And whenever that happens, I get this twinge in my skull of annoyance because apparently EW thinks they know what everybody should watch, read, or hear. It's that kind of peer pressure that got me to start watching Lost.

So you have to imagine my ire of the repetition that goes on over Battlestar Galactica. Battlestar this. Battlestar that. Cylons this. Cylons that. Who's a Cylon? What's a Cylon? Why a Cylon? ¿Donde eston un Cylon? Starbuck, the President of the Galactic Nations, Commander Adama. I understand the show has gone past its science-fiction feel and has evolved as a drama. But I do...not...care! I don't care if the writers at EW keep pitching this show for an Emmy. I won't even care if they have a story line that includes the first and only hardcore bukkake scene on national television (maybe, German national television).

With that said, Battlestar is, like, going off the air and such. All that ranting for nothing, huh?

NCAA Tournament - I will not pretend to know everything about every school in the tournament right now. I just love seeing the sick sports bastards (everyday people like you and me) when they know the starting two guard for the Robert Morris University basketball team, for example. They know nothing! NOTHING!

I will say though this is the best part of the year: flowers are blooming, women are ovulating and undersexed from the winter blues, and the psychological condition called March Madness takes affect. Enjoy your games this weekend. And if you think you know everything there is about the Morehead State University Eagles, then you, sir, are a liar! A big, stinking, f*ckin' LIAR!

UPDATE: Apparently, Judd Apatow had nothing to do with I Love You, Man. I coulda swore that that was the case. I'll just say, just to make sure I gets my ducks in a row, having both Jason Segal and Paul Rudd in this movie will confuse muthaf'ers. Shows you how much I "fact-check."