Where the Hell Was This Show When I Was in Middle School?

Hold numbers 3, 7, and 274: Armbar!

So MTV, which does not exist in my world of worlds (f*ckin' Laguna Beach muthaf*ckers), recently premiered Bully Beatdown, a sort-of revenge show for those tortured by bullies and can't take their shit no mo'.

The premise has the victim reach out to MMA champ Jason "Mayhem" Miller and to have Miller or another professional fighter face the bully --you know the "pick on somebody your own size" cliche, but now with more punches to the face. Towards the end, the MMA dudes beat down on the bullies. If the bullies can last the onslaught of technical moves and jabs and knees to the head, they earn money up to $10,000. If they pussy out, their victims get the money. It's revenge in the sweetest degree, superficially.

I'm all for this show [interview with "Mayhem" at Asylum], but I'm so neurotic to the point that what if the torturers themselves, the bullies, can counter all this MMA shit. What if they actually train or their just so big and tough they can withstand a missle. I guess they'll be forced to bring a gun in to the ring. Let's see you bully that! Ah YEAH! EXTREME!

Trailer:

I think the basis of "bullyism" is that the bullies have always wanted to make up for their microscopic penises (penii?) I have no sociological study that says that but yeah I think that's it.