First, what the hell do I know about DJ AM? No offense to him, his memory, and all of his accomplishments, but I do not know what made him who he is besides his job of spinning records at big parties held by celebutantes and whatnot. But of course, we can always point back at the horrific plane crash he and drummer Travis Barker miraculously survived. So, no, I'm not so sad about DJ AM himself but rather sad about the fraility of life that followed AM. It's prophetic because of the circumstances around his death.
So Adam Goldstein, AM's real name, died only a year after enduring severe burns in the South Carolina plane crash. TMZ says prescription pills were found around AM's body when he was found dead in a NYC apartment.
All I know about AM is he was friends with Paris Hilton, used to date Nicole Richie and Mandy Moore, and was on that damn episode of Entourage in which he takes a pair of stupid ass graffiti'd Nikes from Turtle.
I don't know. It sucks that another person has died, albeit someone who got moderately famous for being famous, then notorized for surviving something he should have died in. But look at it this way. He's now spinning records in the afterlife behind a Michael Jackson performance in a nightclub that includes Billy Mays, Natasha Richardson, Les Paul, Ed McMahon, Karl Malden, Edward Kennedy, and Charo. Charo's dead right?
Or more like the lack of it. Hardee har har! This new restricted clip is from the new slasher flick Sorority Row. Despite the main cast being five alright looking chicks and Rumer Willis (have you seen her nose?!), the movie appears to be rehashing all of those slasher flicks of the past, especially the contemporaries (i.e. I Know What You Did Last Summer, Scream, Chocolat). But this clip was rather interesting. It had Margo Harshmann, which you may remember from a little show on Disney Channel called Even Stevens. It also had her forcefully inhaling a bottle. No, this is not a fetish sex clip. But it was an interesting way to write a death scene. Enjoy!
Apparently, fighting on the basketball court is universal. B-ballers can talk smack and shit like this can go down. I'm not ashamed at all. I just love how the Mexican and Uruguyan (?) basketball players playing under FIBA rules just go at it. Spanish be damned! Pinches all over the court. AY AYAYAYAYAYA! RRRRRRRRrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!
In brief, two "underage" girls were arrested for stripping at an exotic dance bar or what have you. News crews in the Orlando market get wind of it and start looking for relatives of one of the girls, which is poor by standard procedure when something as juicy as this is brought up. News crew finds woman supposedly related to one of the girls. Woman apparently has a gardening tool handy to confront news crew. Roll credits. Somebody see the irony of underage strippers and a woman wielding a hoe? Anybody?
ABC News correspondent Dan Harris is the man to see for the hard hitting, accurate journalism we look for in this era of modern information-sharing. If any part of that statement is true, then may I be pummeled and slashed with razor blades by 80 fat topless women. That's right. No fat topless women with razor blades here.
So Harris provided that brand of hard hitting interviewing when he sat down with Entourage guest star Jamie-Lynn Sigler, who plays herself playing another chick playing a girlfriend of the second least attractive member of the Vince crew, shlubby Turtle. Sigler also dates the guy who plays shlubby Turtle, Jerry Ferrera. And like the hard hitting, fact checking journalist that he is, Harris asks Sigler, to the effect of "do you think hot girls like you will date fat jackasses like Turtle?" And from there, awkwardness and uncomfortability ensues.
If that wasn't enough, Harris provides commentary on the interview knowing he didn't know that Sigler and Ferrera are dating. Bottom line, Harris and ABC are jackasses for thinking they can get the hip, Hollywood stories and knowing them all without research. No sarcastic remark here. I just want to take pride and self-satisfication in seeing Harris squearm when he finds out the truth. Toodles!
That Miss Teen USA chick and that chick from 90210. No, the OTHER chick from 90210.
The possibilities are endless when you are presented a single image of two naked women and the lone dude behind the camera, of whom is also naked. Then, you're let down because the situation of two naked women, one of them your wife, the other some random chick you happen to know, and you, yourself, naked does not equate to sex on camera, which pretty much eliminates the purpose of having a camera on when all parties involved are in their birthday suits.
Alas, you have the situation involving Grey's Anatomy actor Eric Dane and his wife Rebecca Gayheart, who hasn't been on a good project since, I don't know, Jawbreaker? And the former Miss Teen USA and admitted sex addict Kari Anne Paniche. All of whom appeared naked in a 12-minute video leaked online today. (You know what else leaks online? R. Kelly. Sick son of a bitch.) As with anything as sensitive and revealing as this (see Vanessa Hudgens, Ashley Greene), publicists for the involved parties (listen to me, I'm all into this legalese shit) say it was nothing other than "concensual" nakedness on camera and "no sex" was made. Although, you might have to admit, sex has been made in all of this, and if that's so, Rebecca Gayheart is probably one cool chick to involve Miss Teen USA in a three-way with her husband.
Bottom line, this "concensual" video looked like a sex tape, smelled like a sex tape, and even tasted like a sex tape. In all the sleaziness in my body, I'm very dissappointed when this wasn't a sex tape. How am I able to "pull the chain" with a tape of Rebecca Gayheart and Miss Teen USA just being naked without the fornication?
[Editor's Note: Ew. I don't do that. I do that only with established pros. Click, Open, Video file of Boner Jams '03]
I'm open to girl fights all the time. Nothing says all-American when two women who disagree with something so trivial as talking about each other behind each other's back or not being there for each other when they should have been. I don't know, that's what girls argue about, right? I am working that stereotype, right?
Anyways, I made that whole prologue to point out that a women's MMA match main evented a MMA card for the first time in history. And it pitted my darling Gina Carano and some woman named Cyborg. Needless to say, as I called it in a previous post, my Gina-bear got beaten to the canvas just as hard as a Van Gogh painting. Cyborg relentlessly pounded the technically-sound Carano in the first round with the ref calling the fight 1 second before the first round bell.
Despite all the hoopla, I think this beats the hell out of the classic girl-on-girl matchups. Venus vs. Serena. Seles vs. Graf. Kramer vs. Kramer. Maybe not so much Kramer vs. Kramer but how many girlfights have there been?
Hopefully my Gina-bear recovers from this. I'll get you ice and a nice heat pack for you, baby.
[Deadspin] You do body shots on girls, not on yourself! Silly.
Noted recovering alcholic and tatted up Texas Ranger Josh Hamilton apparently lapsed sobriety...and apparently had fun doing it. There shouldn't be a big deal about this but when a home run derby champ is flaunted on ESPN as someone who overcame "a sickness" then this is big news.
But then again, he is getting licked. Damn you, Hamilton. Maybe I need to become an alcoholic, say I've become sober, and then relapse...maybe that's how you get all the womens.
Believe me. The loss of John Hughes is pretty sad for me. Despite me goo-goo ga-ga-ing the rest of the '80s, I was fully aware of Mr. Hughes' impact on cinema. He kept the angsty '80's teen happy with the "this is so me" type of stories. Sixteen Candles. The Breakfast Club. Pretty in Pink. Ferris Bueller's Day Off. Planes Trains & Automobiles. Ok, maybe not so much Planes Trains as far as teen angst is concerned, but all are very relevent and all have had their funny moments.
Of course, you can be free to ignore his '90's works Home Alone, Baby's Day Out, Flubber, Home Alone 3?! But then again, why would you? He knew what he was doing for a whole decade and that kind of story writing and decision-making makes him kinda cool in my book.
So without further ado, here's what YouTube is showing for John Hughes' Ferris Bueller's Day Off:
What can you expect from a Judd Apatow-written and directed movie? Disenchantment. Check. Laughs. Check. Crude jokes about nuts and balls and dicks. Check. Meaningful lessons to make the viewer all the richer for having experienced it. Ah. Eh?
Funny People was two hours and 20 minutes of creating a microcosm of fame and the Hollywood lifestyle -- the attempt at it and living it -- and trying to make it human through the main characters all too real diagnosis of a life-ending disease. But then again, it was exactly everything described above with Adam Sandler playing a famous schlub lying in his own piss, metaphorically speaking, of course. Sandler's character, George Simmons, is basically a parity of Sandler's own career. Simmons, a Jewish comedian, grows up from the humble beginnings of stand-up comedy and finagled his way into the Hollywood film machine to make panderous types of entertainment flub that the general brain-dead population enjoys (i.e. Sandler's movies like The Wedding Singer and Click). Still, he has a natural knack for wit, which there are no shortages of in this movie. So Simmons, who lives in opulance because of his big box office career, recieves news that he has a debilitating disease that would most likely kill him. At this point of the movie, and, by extension, in life, news like this would become heavy for one to deal with to the point that you start rethinking your life and appreciating what little of it you have. It takes about 30 minutes of the movie for Simmons to take that turn.
In the process, he takes on a comedic apprentice played very well by Seth Rogen. His turn as a hungry, wide-eyed comedian with great naivete complemented Sandler's "what does it all mean" mentality in the movie. The "what does it all mean" mentality comes to life in the form of Leslie Mann's character Laura, who finally gets the prominent role that she greatly deserves, albeit it came in a movie her husband wrote and directed. Mann's character was hurt badly over a dozen years ago by Simmons who apparently cheated on her. Of course, clues like that were the tipping point of how Simmons became the hardened person he would become. Anyways, Laura sympathizes with Simmons' condition and the two start reconnecting in the face of it. There's also a point that both get comfortable with each other again that Laura reveals that her husband, played by Eric Bana, cheats on her and is barely around for her family.
So Simmons basically loafs around about his own mortality and how this disease will take him. There is total fear in Sandler's character. But then, he gets news that he may have beaten the disease. And all will be better, right? Well, we get a little hairy at this point of the story. At this point, we're to believe that Sandler will get the girl that she's been thinking of since she left him.
One blogger pointed out that this movie ended becoming an episode of Entourage where at the end all will be fine and nobody gets hurt and nobody really learns a lesson. And I have to agree. I felt no growth among the characters as the story progressed, maybe a little with Seth Rogen's character Ira, who went from loser comedy schlub to somebody who knew what was right and wrong and could stand on his own feet to make that decision. Sandler's performance was completely different than from what we're used to seeing him. We're accustomed to seeing him beat up Bob Barker or make incoherent baby-like noises. But as Simmons, he portrays a funny man who cannot deal with the 10-ton of bricks that fell on his lap such as a disease diagnosis. Or being passed over by the only woman she ever loved. Not his best performance, though. (On a side note, I thought his best performance came in the form of the Wedding Singer. Don't judge me, I thought it was his best.)
As a Judd Apatow-comedy, it excelled when jokes and one-liners came through. Apatow can really convey from his actors a good response given the gravity of a scene. And the picture was beautifully shot. Of course, Apatow recruited the services of Oscar-winning cinematographer Janusz Kaminski (see Schlinder's List, Jerry Maguire).
In short, the story fell short of becoming a story of growth especially for Adam Sandler's character. But then again, we got one of Sandler's best performances. We may have also gotten Seth Rogen's best performance in his career so far (I'll cautiously stop short of saying Supporting Actor Oscar material). And the comedy of Funny People did not dissappoint, although it took too long for the story to be told. A little too long for an Apatow film.
As a special bonus, here's the YouTube vid of Jonah Hill's character in Funny People playing with cute kittens. 700,000 hits. Why?!
