Kris Allen - Heartless - Live on Late Night

Damn. He made a Kanye song better than Kanye.

I watched none of this past season's American Idol. Frankly, I didn't care if Adam Lambert had to much sugar in his tank or whatever. And there was no off the chart hot chick that made it towards the end. Take notes America, vote for the moderatly talented, extremely sexy blonde next time.

So apparently the American Idol winner Kris Allen did an acoustic rendition of Kanye West's "Heartless" during the season. And he did it again on Late Night with Conan O'Brien Jimmy Fallon. I'll just say that I could hear America's collective panties drop during that performance. And, I'll admit the boy sure got some soul. I wouldn't care as much usually but it was Kanye song I think I can sing better if I was hogtied and had ants crawling up my legs. Oh, here's the performance:

Katharine's Got 'Paparazzi Protection'

Trust me. That's Katharine McPhee.

Funny or Die is once again helping an otherwise unfunny celebrity get all hilarious and what not, this time with a vid about Quween, Katharine McPhee's "paparazzi protection."

Quween apparently got up from her box she was sleeping in and came to the American Idol runner-up's rescue (video here) when she was just walking down the street in L.A. She was bat shit crazy then and, in this vid, she's bat shit crazy now. And now, thanks to viral internets and all those blogging trends and Jello pudding, Quween will be appearing next season on Dancing with the Stars. I called it!

Can we get back to Katherine McPhee, though? I mean, besides her DO-ability, she is so cute and so beautiful. And she sings like an angel. She would be the perfect wife.

What?

She's married?

To who?

Who?!

He's 45?!