Levi, You Bastard. You're Gonna Jinx It!

Answer: "Live long and prosper." Question: What will Chuck not do in its episodic run because its star had blind optimism?

I've been gushing for months over NBC's spy comedy Chuck. It's a unique show with equal wit and action that is unlike anything else on TV right now. Seriously, I like this show. Maybe it's because of the nerd motif that repeats itself over and over in the show. Plus, it doesn't hurt to have someone as sexy/beautiful as Yvonne Strahovski. [booty shots here]

But after a season full of character and plot advancement, there comes the proposition of renewing a sleeper hit. It's a hit, just nobody's watching. You know, like how Arrested Development was or how Heroes is, although I hate Heroes and everytime somebody looks at me, they go "You look like that Asian dude on that one show. Show me that time travel, shit-taking face!" The show has a lot going against it as far as finding a place in the NBC sked, namely Medium, the treasure trove of NBC sleeper hit comedies, the freakin' Law and Order shows, and muthaf*ckin' Jay Leno. Plus, the network has new future failures to pick up.

It kinda irks me too to hear that Chuck himself, Zachary Levi, "feels optimistic" about the show's chances of renewal. I'm a firm believer of not getting your hopes up. Get way too far up in the atmosphere expecting anything and expect reality, instead, to kick you side the head. Maybe, that's why I remain "un-laid" for all this long. That's for another blog, though.

EW.com:

"I think the chances are good that we'll come back," he said at last night's Star Trek premiere.

There's other stuff in the article including Levi's drive to have Chuck fans buy $5 footlong sandwiches at Subway, which is the show's main sponsor.

Who knows what happens to this show come Monday when the '09-'10 fall lineup is announced? And I was a little bummed about the finale because apparently Chuck knows "kung-fu" like The Matrix and we're going to get a different dynamic on the show next season if it gets to that point. Plus, we didn't get to see that girl-on-girl scene we were promised between Yvonne and Chuck's on-screen sis, Sarah Lancaster. Darnit.

Like the show or not, though, I think you'll like this clip:

Douchebaggery, Miami-Style

The killer douche...made...a fresh and clean getaway. YEAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

I am depressed on this Monday of Mondays. Aside from the downfall I've seen in my personal life, I'm probably bearing witness to the last Chuck of all-time tonight. I could say a thousand things about the show and give you reasons to watch it. But one episode viewing is enough to make up your mind on the validity and the entertainment factor it holds.

With that said, my Mondays, for at least the next couple of weeks, are spoken for as far as television viewing (How I Met Your Mother, wrestling [Yeah, I still watch wrestling. Big whoop. Wanna fight about it?!]). The schedule does not include CSI:Miami, which I consider the inbred cousin-sister-brother of CSI [Colon] and CSI [Colon] The One with the Chick from 'Providence' with the Hard to Pronounce Last Name and the Dude Who Had No Legs in 'Forrest Gump' but Suddenly Got New Legs at the End. I have turned to other blogging sites to seek solace on a day full of melancholy and embarrassing sadness (Yes, bloggers get emotional, too). It wasn't until 4:15 p.m. that I could get the remedy I need on such a day. That's when I caught on with the best sunglasses wearing, one-liner saying, red-headed B-movie star that actually has steady work on a prime time television serial.

David Caruso, begin your incoherent one-line hijinx. YEEEEEEEEEAHHHHHHHHH!!!

I suggest playing this on days when you believe you are less than nothing. Witnessing douchebaggery is sometimes beneficial and uplifting. Too bad the same...can't be said...for the dead emo hipster. YEEEEEEEEEEEEEAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

Cooter Suiter: One Line Thoughts for 4/21

The Rebel Force will be run by wookies. 'Nuff said.

Picture above is actually that of Iranian snipers and not wookies. But in your heart of hearts, Chewie's species don't need AKs to kick ass.

Lily Allen was on The View, essentially down-playing her real-life role as a "popwreck." I want to believe her, but I can't. That third nipple of hers is all the reason.

Apparently, The Fray likes "fish sticks" as well as the freakin' Grey's Anatomy band covers Kanye's "Heartless."

For the 10 millionth time, I will not Tweet. I refuse to do it. And, if, by God, you make me do it, I will burn your house down, pee on the ashes, burn the ashes, and take a dump on them. I mean it!

Yvonne Strahovski on Chuck provides us fanboys with the much-needed super female spy sexiness that we've sorely missed with Jennifer Garner's Sydney Bristow on Alias. Last night's episode was that proof. [Screen grabs here and video here. WARNING: White cotton panty action.]

I find a lot of irony that a Taco Bell in Indiana has been the hot bed for rampant sexual activity. The downer: it took kids who walked-in on the action in progress for the shit to be exposed. Video here.

Finally, get ready to make your own Godfather/"I got a horse head in my bed" jokes now. Story HERE.

Sunday Was Easter, Weird

I have officially "Perezed" this pic. Did you know Kristin Davis had a Hitler 'stache?

I was actually happy to go to church on Sunday, however long I haven't gone and however the time I went (8 a.m., but sure beats sunrise services). I followed the Catholic tradition of going to church on the "biggie" days of the year. The other days beside Easter, under unofficial Christian protocol, are on Christmas and when you desperately want God to do something for you. Don't think you haven't asked for something from God one day and then, the other days, it's a simple output of the Creator. Don't put him on the backbruner, dammit!

Anyways, Easter weekend fell on the same weekend the droves of gay men decided to show up in my sleepy town. You know, it's the fabulous day of the year for the male homosexual persuasion: White Party Weekend. It's unique to find out the lore behind the weekend. You find out things like what exactly the 25,000 or so gay men do on this particular weekend, no details included. The thing off-putting was that I live just down street from my town's gay central and I could literally hear and see the Party go down. There was a freakin' ferris wheel there! A big gay ferris wheel. Needless to say, I reveled and detested the fact of the party being just screaming distance away. But you gotta admit, they have some cool ass music. Damn, that music is hot.

Fitting into the day of the White Party, I decided willingly to watch Sex and the City: The Movie On Demand. Why you ask? Eh. I don't know either. I mean, the day just seemed destined to have me sit in on two hours of estrogenic hijinks and talk of Louis Vuitton handbags and shoes! SHOES! I really haven't watched the series and something about seeing Samantha have sex is just icky. The movie was cute, for the most part. Then, I made the required subsequent vomiting after viewing the movie. Freakin' SJP. She's not as hot as she used to be in the early 90s. Dude, I just remembered. She was in the First Wives Club. Eck, how am I rehashing these chick flicks?

I also watched Chuck On Demand as well. This show's pretty underrated for NBC, but, then again, they promo the hell out of Heroes and Medium and nothing really comes of it so I figure the same is happening to Chuck. I actually like this show and plan to watch tonight's new one coming on at 9 p.m. That's if my fancy is put off at that point. I mean, I watched freakin' Sex and the City and heard a gay disco go down feet away.

Eh. No more blogging. I figure this is filler just to get back on track after a whole week of getting sick and spreading it. Those herpes flare ups are awfully inconvenient.